This Halloween shall forever be known as " The Great Pumpkin Disaster of '13".
Every year we look forward to carving pumpkins. We each get our own, because: (A) We have very different ideas about pumpkin carving in general. (B) Refer back to "A". I like traditional pumpkin faces, and The Brown Eyed Man likes to go wild! He's amazing, and I love to watch him do his thing, but I like to carve too, even if I'm not as artistic. I also LOVE roasted pumpkin seeds, and this is the one night of the year I can gorge myself silly on them.
Last week The Man picked up our pumpkins, but we just didn't have time over the busy weekend to carve them. We have a standing date night on Wednesdays to watch "Coven", so that turned out to be the perfect time.
His pumpkin was big, all bumpy and odd shaped. I couldn't wait to see what he would create out of it! Mine was big, plain, round, and pretty even. A perfect ol triangle eyed, happy faced pumpkin if I ever saw one. So we begin, and half way through I notice something.
Me: Did you ever notice that every single thing we do we approach from the exact opposite angle??
Him: (laughing) Yep.
Me: I cut open the pumpkin and gut it first, and you immediately grab a marker and start to draw.
Him: (Silence)
Me: I'm not saying either way is wrong, just that we always get to the end product in opposite ways.
Him: Yep. My way is not wrong.
Me: I didn't say it was, BUT how can you draw it first? You're going to smear it, and get it all over you when you goop it out. It's much better to goop it first.
Him: Did the words "You are wrong." come out of my mouth?
Me: No, but that's what you were thinking.
Then it happened.
He turned the pumpkin around so I could see it, and it was shaping up to be something amazing. I wish at some point I had taken a pick of that cool pumpkin. The Brown Eyed Man stuck the knife in the top, cut her open, and then gagged. It was totally rotten inside. Just about the most disgusting thing I have ever seen. There were already lil flies, right inside of the pumpkin! Then the smell hit me, and I gagged.
I told him to just toss it out the patio door, which he did. Right smack onto the little table that sits between our Adirondack chairs, and busted it to bits............
Meanwhile, pumpkin seeds from my pumpkin were cooking, and the smell was at least covering up the smell of rotted pumpkin. I offered my pumpkin up to his artistic abilities, but he declined. So I continued on with my happy pumpkin, who turned out to be a bit of a hillbilly. (BOO-boo Child is what I called it.) The Brown Eyed Man started offering suggestions, and I suggested he remove himself from the kitchen. He had his chance.
So I finished up, got the candle, and we had our one lone pumpkin to light the room while we watched "Coven", and ate pumpkin seeds. However, I burned the seeds. In all my life I have never burned the seeds! I was so peeved I could have thrown a full blown tantrum on the kitchen floor.
To top it off, I forgot the pumpkin when I came back to town today, so what will be my last Halloween on Hughitt Avenue will not be graced with a pumpkin on the steps. Yep, I said my last. Rent has gone up again, and I'm through giving that man my money. That's about all I know right now. I WILL be out by the end of the year.
Anyhoo...... I can't wait to see all the trick-or-treaters out tonight! The biggest bowl I own is full of candy, and will hopefully be empty by 8pm. Come on down!
Every year we look forward to carving pumpkins. We each get our own, because: (A) We have very different ideas about pumpkin carving in general. (B) Refer back to "A". I like traditional pumpkin faces, and The Brown Eyed Man likes to go wild! He's amazing, and I love to watch him do his thing, but I like to carve too, even if I'm not as artistic. I also LOVE roasted pumpkin seeds, and this is the one night of the year I can gorge myself silly on them.
Last week The Man picked up our pumpkins, but we just didn't have time over the busy weekend to carve them. We have a standing date night on Wednesdays to watch "Coven", so that turned out to be the perfect time.
His pumpkin was big, all bumpy and odd shaped. I couldn't wait to see what he would create out of it! Mine was big, plain, round, and pretty even. A perfect ol triangle eyed, happy faced pumpkin if I ever saw one. So we begin, and half way through I notice something.
Me: Did you ever notice that every single thing we do we approach from the exact opposite angle??
Him: (laughing) Yep.
Me: I cut open the pumpkin and gut it first, and you immediately grab a marker and start to draw.
Him: (Silence)
Me: I'm not saying either way is wrong, just that we always get to the end product in opposite ways.
Him: Yep. My way is not wrong.
Me: I didn't say it was, BUT how can you draw it first? You're going to smear it, and get it all over you when you goop it out. It's much better to goop it first.
Him: Did the words "You are wrong." come out of my mouth?
Me: No, but that's what you were thinking.
Then it happened.
He turned the pumpkin around so I could see it, and it was shaping up to be something amazing. I wish at some point I had taken a pick of that cool pumpkin. The Brown Eyed Man stuck the knife in the top, cut her open, and then gagged. It was totally rotten inside. Just about the most disgusting thing I have ever seen. There were already lil flies, right inside of the pumpkin! Then the smell hit me, and I gagged.
I told him to just toss it out the patio door, which he did. Right smack onto the little table that sits between our Adirondack chairs, and busted it to bits............
Meanwhile, pumpkin seeds from my pumpkin were cooking, and the smell was at least covering up the smell of rotted pumpkin. I offered my pumpkin up to his artistic abilities, but he declined. So I continued on with my happy pumpkin, who turned out to be a bit of a hillbilly. (BOO-boo Child is what I called it.) The Brown Eyed Man started offering suggestions, and I suggested he remove himself from the kitchen. He had his chance.
 |
| BOO- boo Child |
So I finished up, got the candle, and we had our one lone pumpkin to light the room while we watched "Coven", and ate pumpkin seeds. However, I burned the seeds. In all my life I have never burned the seeds! I was so peeved I could have thrown a full blown tantrum on the kitchen floor.
To top it off, I forgot the pumpkin when I came back to town today, so what will be my last Halloween on Hughitt Avenue will not be graced with a pumpkin on the steps. Yep, I said my last. Rent has gone up again, and I'm through giving that man my money. That's about all I know right now. I WILL be out by the end of the year.
Anyhoo...... I can't wait to see all the trick-or-treaters out tonight! The biggest bowl I own is full of candy, and will hopefully be empty by 8pm. Come on down!
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