I will come clean, I'm guessing at the year. I would think that my brother and I couldn't have been more than five or six when it happened. I'm still wondering how I didn't get the blame, because heavens it certainly couldn't have been HIS fault.
I'm fairly certain the holiday we were celebrating was Thanksgiving. We didn't usually go to Aunt Mary and Uncle Clate's for Christmas. We did for Easter a lot, but it was dark at five o'clock dinner time, so that leads me to believe it was Thanksgiving. Aunt Mary had set a beautiful table, the lights were out and we were dining by candlelight. (this must be where I get it from) They had a small kitchen, no dining room, and we were crammed in there like sardines. I was sitting across the table from my brother Jerry, who else was there, or where they were sitting is all a blank to me, but my brothers face is as clear to me as if it happened yesterday.
Now I must tell you that in my Aunt Mary's eyes my brother Jerry could do, and never did (except perhaps this day) anything wrong. A very clear favorite, that's for sure. My best example would be the Christmas my sister and I got purses from Mexico, and my brother got a car. A red jaguar. Not a matchboxer, a car big enough for him to sit in and peddle around. Bastard.
So there he sat across the table from me, angelic little cherub that he was. (not) Grinning at me like a crazy person. I looked back at him, confused, wondering what was up, and then noticed he had a death grip on the water glass stem. (Who gives little children glassware?) His eyes bored into mine with that evil little glimmer he has, my eyebrows shot up, and POP the entire top of the glass popped right off the stem! The glass smashed onto the table, water everywhere. Much Auntie concern about the little lovie being cut, and comments on the weakness of the glass.... my eyes rolling so far back I'm surprised they didn't stick.
Then, she gives him a new goblet. (duh) The table settles in to the murmur of visiting family and feasting. Jerry looks at me, and then my glass. I shoot him back an "are you nuts?" look. No way am I going to follow that one up. I did not just fall off the turnip truck. I would have gotten in trouble, and probably blamed for my brother doing it the first time. So he continues eating for maybe five minutes, then I notice him grinning at me again, his little fist strangling the stem of the water glass. My eyes go wide in alarm, but I didn't really think he could make it pop off like that again. Do I tattle? Nah, I decide to see where this one is going to go, and try to keep myself clean out of it. Suddenly POP! Off comes another one. It shoots into the air still intact, and then smashes on the table. This time mostly empty. My Aunt is shocked. My mother is not. I don't remember what happened afterwards, but I do remember hearing "GERALD EDWARD" coming out of my Mom, and snickering to myself.
It's funny, I can still see that evil little grin he had on his face as if it were yesterday. My Aunt probably went to her grave believing she had faulty stemware. :) Kids, don't try this at home. Ugh, I'm so tempted it's killing me. Happy Thanksgiving! Keep the stemware away from the kids.
I'm fairly certain the holiday we were celebrating was Thanksgiving. We didn't usually go to Aunt Mary and Uncle Clate's for Christmas. We did for Easter a lot, but it was dark at five o'clock dinner time, so that leads me to believe it was Thanksgiving. Aunt Mary had set a beautiful table, the lights were out and we were dining by candlelight. (this must be where I get it from) They had a small kitchen, no dining room, and we were crammed in there like sardines. I was sitting across the table from my brother Jerry, who else was there, or where they were sitting is all a blank to me, but my brothers face is as clear to me as if it happened yesterday.
Now I must tell you that in my Aunt Mary's eyes my brother Jerry could do, and never did (except perhaps this day) anything wrong. A very clear favorite, that's for sure. My best example would be the Christmas my sister and I got purses from Mexico, and my brother got a car. A red jaguar. Not a matchboxer, a car big enough for him to sit in and peddle around. Bastard.
So there he sat across the table from me, angelic little cherub that he was. (not) Grinning at me like a crazy person. I looked back at him, confused, wondering what was up, and then noticed he had a death grip on the water glass stem. (Who gives little children glassware?) His eyes bored into mine with that evil little glimmer he has, my eyebrows shot up, and POP the entire top of the glass popped right off the stem! The glass smashed onto the table, water everywhere. Much Auntie concern about the little lovie being cut, and comments on the weakness of the glass.... my eyes rolling so far back I'm surprised they didn't stick.
Then, she gives him a new goblet. (duh) The table settles in to the murmur of visiting family and feasting. Jerry looks at me, and then my glass. I shoot him back an "are you nuts?" look. No way am I going to follow that one up. I did not just fall off the turnip truck. I would have gotten in trouble, and probably blamed for my brother doing it the first time. So he continues eating for maybe five minutes, then I notice him grinning at me again, his little fist strangling the stem of the water glass. My eyes go wide in alarm, but I didn't really think he could make it pop off like that again. Do I tattle? Nah, I decide to see where this one is going to go, and try to keep myself clean out of it. Suddenly POP! Off comes another one. It shoots into the air still intact, and then smashes on the table. This time mostly empty. My Aunt is shocked. My mother is not. I don't remember what happened afterwards, but I do remember hearing "GERALD EDWARD" coming out of my Mom, and snickering to myself.
It's funny, I can still see that evil little grin he had on his face as if it were yesterday. My Aunt probably went to her grave believing she had faulty stemware. :) Kids, don't try this at home. Ugh, I'm so tempted it's killing me. Happy Thanksgiving! Keep the stemware away from the kids.
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