Solitude

The silence was deafening.

I've never really understood that statement until now. I live alone, and I honestly like it. I am a people person, but only to an extent. I like my little cozy comfy home where I can retreat for days without seeing anyone if I wish. I love my own company. Frankly, I think I'm hilarious! I like quiet activities like writing and reading. However, I guess I wasn't technically alone. The "kids" were always here. Sam is sometimes here. While not human company, they are/were needy little buggers who filled the house with life.

Sam left at 9:15 last night. I don't think it was a half hour before it felt like a cold mausoleum in here. So I sat there "shrinking" myself. Are you afraid to be alone? Is that the problem? No. The problem is that I am a caretaker at heart. I need to be needed, or I need to have something to focus on other than myself. Probably more that last one actually. When adults get too needy, like say.....MEN, it is an absolute turn off to me. However, children (hence my job) and animals are allowed.

So I stood at Target for a LONG time staring at litter box liners. Yes, litter box liners. The cat I'm considering adopting uses the old yucky stuff, and the liner seems the easiest way to go. I picked up the box, put it in my cart. Took it out of the cart, put it on the shelf and walked away. Snagged an air mattress for one goover to sleep on next week while I play Mommy for 5 days, and then promptly went back and put the liners in my cart. They were still there at the check out, so apparently I've decided to take the damn cat.