~Lacey Joy Gayken March 11,1983 - February 14, 2012
I was going to write about the death of Whitney Houston, about how sad it is that she died at such a young age. Then something else happened in my own life, and it put things in perspective. We are all saddened about the Whitney tragedy, but lets face it, she made choices in her life that eventually led to her death, and no one is surprised that it ended this way.
Last night my friends' daughter passed away from Huntington's disease. Huntington's usually strikes older adults, and being diagnosed at my age would be considered relatively young. Lacey was diagnosed at 18, and after watching her aunt die from the disease, and then her own father, she knew exactly what she was in for.
I met her when she was five, and for whatever reason that is always the image I have in my head of her. Long blond hair up in a bun, huge blue eyes, and a little button nose, hiding by her Mom with the little giggle she always had. Spoiled rotten, mostly by her father, who absolutely adored her.
She always wanted so badly to be a Mom, to have her own baby to love, but with a diagnosis of Huntington's, that wasn't possible. Well, it was possible, but not advised. It's a hereditary disease that physically ravages it's victims, but until closer to the end their mental capacity remains in tact. So you are totally aware of what is happening to you and just become more and more trapped in your own body. So at the age of eighteen she learned that her dream was not possible. The disease moved so rapidly back then that soon lots of things weren't possible.
It was about three years ago that Deb was able to get a Make a Wish trip for Lacey to go Disney or Sea World....maybe it was both, in Florida. The people there were wonderful, helping Lacey do everything she wanted, even keeping a dolphin exhibit open after hours so she could get in and swim with them. I remember seeing the joy on her face in the pictures, and hearing the joy and gratitude in her Mom's voice as she proudly showed them off. The doctors back then said that was probably near the end, but she held on.
Lacey did not quite make it to her twenty ninth birthday. She really didn't have the chance to even be an adult, getting so sick at a young age. Over the past ten years so many of us have wondered aloud why this happens. We have talked about the unfairness of it all, and how desperately sad it is. It broke my heart to watch her deteriorate over the years, and it took a lot for me to put my big girl panties on and treat her normally when I saw her, instead of hugging her and crying like I wanted to.
I know that she is in a better place now, free of all the things that were holding her back. Free of the pain and frustration. Probably sitting in a rocking chair singing a baby angel to sleep. Dozens of puppies and kitties at her feet. We wont ever get the answer to the why questions, not in this lifetime anyway. The best we can do is honor her memory, and live our own lives to the fullest.
I will miss you Lacey Lu, you rotten kid. ;) Love you sweetheart. ♥
I was going to write about the death of Whitney Houston, about how sad it is that she died at such a young age. Then something else happened in my own life, and it put things in perspective. We are all saddened about the Whitney tragedy, but lets face it, she made choices in her life that eventually led to her death, and no one is surprised that it ended this way.
Last night my friends' daughter passed away from Huntington's disease. Huntington's usually strikes older adults, and being diagnosed at my age would be considered relatively young. Lacey was diagnosed at 18, and after watching her aunt die from the disease, and then her own father, she knew exactly what she was in for.
I met her when she was five, and for whatever reason that is always the image I have in my head of her. Long blond hair up in a bun, huge blue eyes, and a little button nose, hiding by her Mom with the little giggle she always had. Spoiled rotten, mostly by her father, who absolutely adored her.
She always wanted so badly to be a Mom, to have her own baby to love, but with a diagnosis of Huntington's, that wasn't possible. Well, it was possible, but not advised. It's a hereditary disease that physically ravages it's victims, but until closer to the end their mental capacity remains in tact. So you are totally aware of what is happening to you and just become more and more trapped in your own body. So at the age of eighteen she learned that her dream was not possible. The disease moved so rapidly back then that soon lots of things weren't possible.
It was about three years ago that Deb was able to get a Make a Wish trip for Lacey to go Disney or Sea World....maybe it was both, in Florida. The people there were wonderful, helping Lacey do everything she wanted, even keeping a dolphin exhibit open after hours so she could get in and swim with them. I remember seeing the joy on her face in the pictures, and hearing the joy and gratitude in her Mom's voice as she proudly showed them off. The doctors back then said that was probably near the end, but she held on.
Lacey did not quite make it to her twenty ninth birthday. She really didn't have the chance to even be an adult, getting so sick at a young age. Over the past ten years so many of us have wondered aloud why this happens. We have talked about the unfairness of it all, and how desperately sad it is. It broke my heart to watch her deteriorate over the years, and it took a lot for me to put my big girl panties on and treat her normally when I saw her, instead of hugging her and crying like I wanted to.
I know that she is in a better place now, free of all the things that were holding her back. Free of the pain and frustration. Probably sitting in a rocking chair singing a baby angel to sleep. Dozens of puppies and kitties at her feet. We wont ever get the answer to the why questions, not in this lifetime anyway. The best we can do is honor her memory, and live our own lives to the fullest.
I will miss you Lacey Lu, you rotten kid. ;) Love you sweetheart. ♥
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